there were more penises there than on chat roulette
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
