Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Randomize
