So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
