the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
