I think I died a long time ago.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
