I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
meet me or not, i'm out of control
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
