Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
oh god was she eating orange peels again
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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