I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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