I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize