It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
