Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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