Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
