im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
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Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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