Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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