If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
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