Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
