she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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