he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
