You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
