shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
