Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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