And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
