So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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