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i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
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