Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
