You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
