its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
