Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I enjoy the company of your penis
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
