Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
