I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
where am i from again
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
