Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
it hurts more in the daytime
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
