There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
