Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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