she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I'm gonna fight the coyote
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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