marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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