If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
