I think my vagina is haunted
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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