whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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