if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Can I color on your dick again?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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