She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
