he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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