I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
