Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
