At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
