great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize