We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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