Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
be right there i have to get my cape
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
