I will die if light touches me.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
