fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
