i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
